[A moan slips passed his lips as she kisses him, his hips rocking against hers gently, feeling that same desperation, that same need to be closer.]
Yeah? How do I compare to your imagination? [His response is cocky but the crack in his voice halfway through betrays the way that makes him feel. It’s not that he doesn’t trust her, he just isn’t good at being vulnerable, at sharing his feelings, and now certainly isn’t the time for it, even if time is in short supply. He just hopes he has a chance to tell her later. If not, hopefully the way his lips press a little harder tell her what his words can’t, and the way his hand reaches for hers, their fingers intertwining for a moment lets her know that he feels it too.
He wishes again that he could stay, stop time and just live in this moment, be with her and only her. His hand squeezes hers one more time before he moves it to her thigh, pulling her leg higher up on his hip so he has better access, groaning as he pushes into her, moving slow since it’s been awhile for him too. He wants to make it last, wants to give her this at least, wants to make it count.]
[It's a breathless answer, holding tight to his hand. Trying to keep it light, but there's a depth there that she can't help showing through, an ache from all that time wishing for it.
She doesn't want to drag this down, though, not now, not when it could change at any time. So she lets him take his hand back even if it's a little reluctant, tries to let herself be distracted again, to feel every bit of the way they're pressed together. She leans up just enough to press a line of messy kisses against his jaw and neck, moaning against his skin as he finally presses into her completely, loud and eager, nipping at his throat.]
[It feels so good, so much after so long. It shakes something loose inside his chest, a tightness he’s been holding onto, it almost comes out as a laugh, but it’s more like a gasp, so happy in this moment, it feels unreal, all those nights spent dreaming about this and now he’s here. He’s reluctant to move, even as his hips grind against her, any small change feels like it could destroy everything.]
Imogene. [Her name comes out before he can prepare for it, laced with far too much emotion, not her nickname but her full name, desire and adoration and love clear within it. It’s too overwhelming, all of his want burning him up from the inside, so prominent he could almost swear she can feel it too.
After a few moments, his willpower gives out and he finally moves, pulling out so he can push back in, his lips pressing wherever they can, his hand still gripping her thigh as his hips repeat the motion again.]
[She doesn't need him to say everything; she's always been good at understanding, and there's so much there, just in one word. She could live off the sound of her name in his mouth, she could give so much up, if it just meant she got to have this. Just for a little while longer, at least.
She presses her lips to the underside of his jaw with a soft sigh. It turns into a hitching cry when he moves, leg flexing under his hand as she arches against him, pressing in to kiss his mouth messily as he withdraws again.]
Sash, Sasha, sweetheart, fuck-- [Words just keep spilling out of her, a breathless chant, his name on her lips over and over. Her hand slides down his arm to cover his, the other tangled in his hair, moving with him as naturally as if they've barely been apart at all.]
[It shouldn’t be a surprise to him that she knows exactly what he needs, she’s always been good at that, at telling his emotions even before he knows them. He’s glad that hasn’t changed, even with the distance between them.
He stays quiet as they move together, building a rhythm, distracted by the sounds out of her mouth, not wanting to miss any of them, it’s only when he can’t hold back any longer that a whine breaks free, his kisses becoming sloppier, his hips stuttering, he’s close, that fire inside him burning outward, spreading through his limbs —-] Imogene, fuck, I’m…I’m gonna —-
[He tries to hold out for a little bit longer, his hand moving from her thigh to between her legs again, pressing against her, offering himself to her inside and out, still focused on her even as he chases his own climax.]
[It's a slower build this time, and all the more intense for it, almost too much for all that it's wanted. Her breath catches when his hand moves between them, drawing a low noise out of her, clutching at him tightly.]
M'with you, come on, babe. [It's a coaxing plea, her voice tight with need. She draws him into another uncoordinated kiss, gasping his name against his mouth as he draws her over the edge again.]
[He tips over right after her, her whole body going tight as she slips over the edge, it’s enough to get him there too, a moan on his lips, his forehead pressed against hers.
It takes him a while to come down, for the stars to move from behind his eyes and his heart to settle. He stays wrapped up in her as he waits, not wanting to move even an inch. They are on borrowed time now, at least they got to have this.]
We’re too good at that, Genie. That must be why we were forced apart. [Once he’s able to think again, he makes a joke to try to ease some of the fear seizing his chest, all of it moving back in once his desire has cleared. He’s not ready to say goodbye. He just has to keep hoping he’ll get lucky this time, and maybe get a few days with her. Or at least the rest of the night.]
[She's not making any moves to get away from him. If anything she's keeping him there, a leg still hitched up around his waist and arms tight around him as they both calm down, her breathing finally starting to slow. She doesn't want to let go. God, she's not ready to let go.]
It's a good theory. [She does her best to laugh in response, but he's not the only one feeling everything else creeping back in. Guilt because she doesn't know if he had a good reason to stay away, fear that it's going to be the last time he's here. Even anger, somewhere deep down where she can barely admit it to herself, because she needed him and he just left.
She tries to laugh, and it breaks halfway through into something closer to a sob, pressing her lips together and her eyes shut tight as she tries to hold it back. The last thing she wants to do is ruin this, especially knowing it can slip away at any moment.]
[As much as she knows him, he also knows her, he just can’t always tell what people need the same way she can. This time it’s fairly easy, his arms holding onto her a little tighter as soon as that heartbreaking noise leaves her mouth, his hands rubbing up and down along her back, lips pressing into her hair, along her temple, her forehead.]
I’ll be back, Genie, I promise. I know where you are now and that professor won’t mind getting me tickets. As soon as I have control again, I’ll come back to you.
[He means it, there isn’t a single thing that could stop him from coming back, the problem is that he doesn’t know the next time he’ll have control. For all he knows it could be another few years. He hopes with everything in him that it isn’t, that he’ll be back soon, that she won’t be alone again.]
[If it's that simple. If he's in control again while he still can manage that. If some other version of him doesn't just -- change his mind, at some point, up and leave again. She still doesn't know why he did it in the first place, who's to say that it won't happen again? If it doesn't turn out that he's angry enough at her for letting it happen to put precautions in place, to stop himself from getting back, she doesn't doubt that the older version of him could figure it out if he really felt he had to. If he doesn't find his soulmate and fall in love before the next time he gets a chance to come back to her.
She wants to believe it so badly, though.]
I know. [Her voice is still thick from the tears that she's refusing to let out, and she gives a shaky laugh, her hand coming up to touch his cheek gently. Trying to ignore the worries that want to start swarming her.] I'm just -- glad you're here.
[He frowns, his hands still rubbing against her back. He’s never seen someone who was glad, look so heartbroken, but he nods. Maybe her saying it is really just her trying to believe it, and he can’t blame her for that.
He leans forward to kiss her, taking the opportunity while he still can, staying very close when he pulls back again.]
I’m kind of mad at you, you know. [There’s a tease in his voice that says he isn’t being serious, that he’s setting up another joke, once she responds he replies.] You didn’t tell me that I become a giant nerd…I was wearing a matching pajama set this morning, Genie. A striped matching pajama set.
[It gets her to smile, genuine even if it's still small, nuzzling another kiss against his cheek.] Sounds cute. You should have taken a picture. And what's wrong with being a giant nerd, huh?
I’ll take one for ya as soon as I get back. Once I have the phone again. [Considering he left it in his room when he hurried out this morning. He lifts one of his hands off her back, tangling it in her hair, twirling some of the strands around his fingers.]
It’s fine for other people. Just didn’t expect it, I guess. [It’s hard to believe he goes from sleeping on the streets, stealing to survive, to practically wearing a suit to bed.]
You forgot it? Does anyone know where you are? [Asked with a little frown. Not that she thinks anything will happen, but she knows that if he hadn't turned up here, she'd be worried about him suddenly losing touch again. At least if they know where he went, they know they can call her.]
Guess it's probably different there than most other places. [She's not actually prying, doesn't even know how much he knows about it, but she is curious where he's been. If he's been okay, for the most part.]
I left it. [A somewhat proud correction. Little rebellions, it’s all he’s capable of. Maybe he will miss something important. He hopes he makes it difficult for the next guy.] The professor probably does. He bought the plane ticket.
[He makes a soft noise of agreement, watching as her hair slides through his fingers, quiet for a moment.] I came from a beach. It was cold so I spent most of the day in my jacket, I never got the chance to look around. Before that I was trying to get to you…I made it as far as Chicago. [He slips into quiet again, just thinking, trying to move back enough to remember where he came from before that.] I think the care home was before Chicago. They weren’t very eventful trips so I can just about remember back.
Okay. [That's good, at least. She knows she would have worried if she'd tried to reach him, though. And she should probably encourage him to let Isaac know, for similar reasons. Just... that can wait, for a while. She's pretty sure that won't actually somehow mean he has to leave, but she can't help the worry.
Her eyes stay on his face as he talks, leaning into his hand, waiting a minute for him to go on before she says anything. Her voice soft, hurting for him, the thought of him out there alone.] I really hoped you'd found somewhere you'd be happy and -- safe. I guess you weren't that lucky.
I don’t think I’d be able to find that without you there. [She is safe for him, and happy. It might come off as flirty, it’s also the truth, even if other versions of him don’t think so.]
You never know. [But she doesn't really sound like she wants to argue, smiling at him a little, leaning up to kiss him again softly. She's just happy she can do that for him, even if it's only sometimes.]
[He kisses her back, not arguing even though he wants to. He supposes that at this point, she would know more than him on the matter. It’s frustrating, mad at himself, his later self, for causing her this pain. When they pull back from the kiss, he presses another one to her lips and then more all around her face, just trying to get her to smile.]
[She can't help giggling a little at the gesture, a grin on her face that she's not even trying to hold back. Despite everything, despite all the worries, she's just so fucking happy to see him.]
You had a long flight, do you need anything? A nap? Dinner?
[The look he gives her when she suggests a nap is downright offended, as if he is wasting a moment of this on sleep. It clears though when she suggests dinner. Now that his other desires as satisfied, he is starting to feel hungry again.]
I could definitely eat. [He kisses her one more time before they start moving, just wanting to revel in it as much as he can.]
[She leans into it, lingering, her hand against his arm as she finally pulls away, squeezing it gently.] Come on, then, I'm sure I've got something in there for you. [Granted it's mostly frozen foods and takeout leftovers, too busy for anything that takes time, but she doubts he's going to be picky, especially with how skinny he's gotten.
She doesn't bother to get dressed again as she slides off the bed, just scoops up his shirt on her way back through the living room, figures it'll cover her well enough. Anyway, that's one of the nice things about having her own place, not having to worry about anyone else, even if she doesn't have many reasons to take advantage of it these days. There's a little galley kitchen off the living room, cramped but functional enough, a half-full coffee pot sitting on the counter near the entrance, and she gestures for him to take a look while she hovers there to make herself a cup.]
[For a moment he doesn’t move, just sits up and watches her, still completely devastated by how beautiful she looks, so different from how he was still imagining her, but better, so much better, and finally here.
He stretches as he gets out of bed, grabbing his boxers but not bothering with much else as he follows her back out to the living room. He presses his hand against the small of her back, kissing the side of her head as he walks by her to get to the kitchen, then immediately starts looking through what she’s got.
He grabs a slice of pizza and starts eating that cold as he pulls out a few other things, leftover rice, and some kind of meat. Another slice of pizza after the first gets his approval, and some water.]
I’m guessing you didn’t see me… [The other him. The one he’s mad at.] But did I at least say hi when I got back?
[She leans against the counter, not making any attempt to hide the way she's watching him, drinking in the sight of him. She's had dreams about him being here like this. Living here, staying with her. She doesn't think it ever would have happened, even if he'd stayed, but she'll take what she can get.]
I was thinking about coming in at the end of the month for a little while. Spend our birthday back home. You offered to talk to the professor about helping me get there. [Offered like it should prove something. See, he wasn't avoiding her completely, not really. Not anymore.]
[He frowns again at just a text, the slice of pizza halfway to his mouth, he lowers it slightly. Not even a phone call?
He's glad at least that he offered to get her out there, but god. What must happen for him to act so mean towards her? Clearly nothing she's done so far. He nods as he dishes out some food for himself on a plate and pops it in the microwave.] You should do that. It sounds fun. You shouldn't be here on your birthday. [Shouldn't be alone.]
Maybe you could...try to talk to me? [Unfortunately there isn't much he can do from where he is at. He could leave notes but this version ignores that, the later versions could just do the same. But he doubts the feelings that he has right now, the way he feels about her just went away. Maybe if she tries to talk to the later versions, they might have a chance to still be together. At least like this.]
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Yeah? How do I compare to your imagination? [His response is cocky but the crack in his voice halfway through betrays the way that makes him feel. It’s not that he doesn’t trust her, he just isn’t good at being vulnerable, at sharing his feelings, and now certainly isn’t the time for it, even if time is in short supply. He just hopes he has a chance to tell her later. If not, hopefully the way his lips press a little harder tell her what his words can’t, and the way his hand reaches for hers, their fingers intertwining for a moment lets her know that he feels it too.
He wishes again that he could stay, stop time and just live in this moment, be with her and only her. His hand squeezes hers one more time before he moves it to her thigh, pulling her leg higher up on his hip so he has better access, groaning as he pushes into her, moving slow since it’s been awhile for him too. He wants to make it last, wants to give her this at least, wants to make it count.]
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[It's a breathless answer, holding tight to his hand. Trying to keep it light, but there's a depth there that she can't help showing through, an ache from all that time wishing for it.
She doesn't want to drag this down, though, not now, not when it could change at any time. So she lets him take his hand back even if it's a little reluctant, tries to let herself be distracted again, to feel every bit of the way they're pressed together. She leans up just enough to press a line of messy kisses against his jaw and neck, moaning against his skin as he finally presses into her completely, loud and eager, nipping at his throat.]
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Imogene. [Her name comes out before he can prepare for it, laced with far too much emotion, not her nickname but her full name, desire and adoration and love clear within it. It’s too overwhelming, all of his want burning him up from the inside, so prominent he could almost swear she can feel it too.
After a few moments, his willpower gives out and he finally moves, pulling out so he can push back in, his lips pressing wherever they can, his hand still gripping her thigh as his hips repeat the motion again.]
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She presses her lips to the underside of his jaw with a soft sigh. It turns into a hitching cry when he moves, leg flexing under his hand as she arches against him, pressing in to kiss his mouth messily as he withdraws again.]
Sash, Sasha, sweetheart, fuck-- [Words just keep spilling out of her, a breathless chant, his name on her lips over and over. Her hand slides down his arm to cover his, the other tangled in his hair, moving with him as naturally as if they've barely been apart at all.]
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He stays quiet as they move together, building a rhythm, distracted by the sounds out of her mouth, not wanting to miss any of them, it’s only when he can’t hold back any longer that a whine breaks free, his kisses becoming sloppier, his hips stuttering, he’s close, that fire inside him burning outward, spreading through his limbs —-] Imogene, fuck, I’m…I’m gonna —-
[He tries to hold out for a little bit longer, his hand moving from her thigh to between her legs again, pressing against her, offering himself to her inside and out, still focused on her even as he chases his own climax.]
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M'with you, come on, babe. [It's a coaxing plea, her voice tight with need. She draws him into another uncoordinated kiss, gasping his name against his mouth as he draws her over the edge again.]
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It takes him a while to come down, for the stars to move from behind his eyes and his heart to settle. He stays wrapped up in her as he waits, not wanting to move even an inch. They are on borrowed time now, at least they got to have this.]
We’re too good at that, Genie. That must be why we were forced apart. [Once he’s able to think again, he makes a joke to try to ease some of the fear seizing his chest, all of it moving back in once his desire has cleared. He’s not ready to say goodbye. He just has to keep hoping he’ll get lucky this time, and maybe get a few days with her. Or at least the rest of the night.]
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It's a good theory. [She does her best to laugh in response, but he's not the only one feeling everything else creeping back in. Guilt because she doesn't know if he had a good reason to stay away, fear that it's going to be the last time he's here. Even anger, somewhere deep down where she can barely admit it to herself, because she needed him and he just left.
She tries to laugh, and it breaks halfway through into something closer to a sob, pressing her lips together and her eyes shut tight as she tries to hold it back. The last thing she wants to do is ruin this, especially knowing it can slip away at any moment.]
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I’ll be back, Genie, I promise. I know where you are now and that professor won’t mind getting me tickets. As soon as I have control again, I’ll come back to you.
[He means it, there isn’t a single thing that could stop him from coming back, the problem is that he doesn’t know the next time he’ll have control. For all he knows it could be another few years. He hopes with everything in him that it isn’t, that he’ll be back soon, that she won’t be alone again.]
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She wants to believe it so badly, though.]
I know. [Her voice is still thick from the tears that she's refusing to let out, and she gives a shaky laugh, her hand coming up to touch his cheek gently. Trying to ignore the worries that want to start swarming her.] I'm just -- glad you're here.
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He leans forward to kiss her, taking the opportunity while he still can, staying very close when he pulls back again.]
I’m kind of mad at you, you know. [There’s a tease in his voice that says he isn’t being serious, that he’s setting up another joke, once she responds he replies.] You didn’t tell me that I become a giant nerd…I was wearing a matching pajama set this morning, Genie. A striped matching pajama set.
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It’s fine for other people. Just didn’t expect it, I guess. [It’s hard to believe he goes from sleeping on the streets, stealing to survive, to practically wearing a suit to bed.]
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Guess it's probably different there than most other places. [She's not actually prying, doesn't even know how much he knows about it, but she is curious where he's been. If he's been okay, for the most part.]
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[He makes a soft noise of agreement, watching as her hair slides through his fingers, quiet for a moment.] I came from a beach. It was cold so I spent most of the day in my jacket, I never got the chance to look around. Before that I was trying to get to you…I made it as far as Chicago. [He slips into quiet again, just thinking, trying to move back enough to remember where he came from before that.] I think the care home was before Chicago. They weren’t very eventful trips so I can just about remember back.
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Her eyes stay on his face as he talks, leaning into his hand, waiting a minute for him to go on before she says anything. Her voice soft, hurting for him, the thought of him out there alone.] I really hoped you'd found somewhere you'd be happy and -- safe. I guess you weren't that lucky.
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You had a long flight, do you need anything? A nap? Dinner?
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I could definitely eat. [He kisses her one more time before they start moving, just wanting to revel in it as much as he can.]
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She doesn't bother to get dressed again as she slides off the bed, just scoops up his shirt on her way back through the living room, figures it'll cover her well enough. Anyway, that's one of the nice things about having her own place, not having to worry about anyone else, even if she doesn't have many reasons to take advantage of it these days. There's a little galley kitchen off the living room, cramped but functional enough, a half-full coffee pot sitting on the counter near the entrance, and she gestures for him to take a look while she hovers there to make herself a cup.]
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He stretches as he gets out of bed, grabbing his boxers but not bothering with much else as he follows her back out to the living room. He presses his hand against the small of her back, kissing the side of her head as he walks by her to get to the kitchen, then immediately starts looking through what she’s got.
He grabs a slice of pizza and starts eating that cold as he pulls out a few other things, leftover rice, and some kind of meat. Another slice of pizza after the first gets his approval, and some water.]
I’m guessing you didn’t see me… [The other him. The one he’s mad at.] But did I at least say hi when I got back?
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[She leans against the counter, not making any attempt to hide the way she's watching him, drinking in the sight of him. She's had dreams about him being here like this. Living here, staying with her. She doesn't think it ever would have happened, even if he'd stayed, but she'll take what she can get.]
I was thinking about coming in at the end of the month for a little while. Spend our birthday back home. You offered to talk to the professor about helping me get there. [Offered like it should prove something. See, he wasn't avoiding her completely, not really. Not anymore.]
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He's glad at least that he offered to get her out there, but god. What must happen for him to act so mean towards her? Clearly nothing she's done so far. He nods as he dishes out some food for himself on a plate and pops it in the microwave.] You should do that. It sounds fun. You shouldn't be here on your birthday. [Shouldn't be alone.]
Maybe you could...try to talk to me? [Unfortunately there isn't much he can do from where he is at. He could leave notes but this version ignores that, the later versions could just do the same. But he doubts the feelings that he has right now, the way he feels about her just went away. Maybe if she tries to talk to the later versions, they might have a chance to still be together. At least like this.]
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